A Week Too Late . . .
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Joke ID | #17284 |
Funny | |
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Category | Medical |
Submitted By | draco150 |
Corrected By | boodler |
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(93 votes so far)
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Not sure if this is up yet but I haven't seen it so here it goes . . .
A 30-year-old man suffers from massive MASSIVE headaches that dominate his life completely and cause him pain almost every single moment of every day. He's been going through this pain since he was around 20 and no doctor has ever been able to help him out in curing the pain though he has tried almost every pain killer, and several surgeries.
One day a doctor calls him in to talk. The man expects another prescription of pain meds and what-not so he goes in, but he's shocked to find that this doctor has actually figured out what's wrong.
"You see, sir," says the doctor, "You have a very very rare condition where your testicles press up against the base of your spine sending a searing pain directly to your brain."
The man is shocked, so he asks the most obvious question though he's sure he knows the answer already. "Doc, what are we going to do about it?"
The doctor replies solemnly that he will have to go under the knife and have his testicles removed. The man agrees, fearing living through the pain for the rest of his life.
The operation goes perfectly and in six days the man is up and moving, completely pain free. The next day he decides to go out and buy a nice suit because he can know go out and enjoy himself.
When he gets there, an elderly man is sitting at the counter, and upon seeing the man he stood up and shouted as loud as he could, "I bet you need a size 36 sports jacket and a pair of trousers with 37 leg and 32 waist."
The man was stunned, muttering, "Well, that's exactly right; how on earth did you know?"
The elderly man replied laughing, "Son, I've been in the business for 50 years, there ain't no one that can fool me."
So the man tried on his clothes and they fit perfectly. The old man smiled again and said, "What did I tell you, I've been in the business for 50 years!"
So the man stood in line to buy his new clothing when he realized he needed new underwear as well, so he turned to the old man and said, "I bet you can't guess my size in underwear."
The old man looked him up and down and the announced, "You need a size 10"
The man then laughed and said, "I got you! I've been wearing a size 8 since I was about 20!"
Now the old man was puzzled and said, "Well sir, to be frank that's impossible. For a man of your size a size 8 would press your testicles up against the base of your spine, giving you one hell of a nasty headache."