Some Of My Favorite One-Liners


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Joke ID#7742
Funny (3.14)
Rating (0.49)
CategoryOne Liners  
Submitted Byjuggleboy502
Corrected By salem33466
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(198 votes so far)

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Never test the depth of water with both feet.

Don't take candy from strangers, unless they offer you a ride.

I'll start exercising as soon as i get into shape.

If you have something to say, raise your hand and put it over your mouth.

Maybe you should go to e-bay and buy a clue.

Earth is full. go home.

Gee, I'd like to care, but I wasn't given that gene.

Mirrors don't lie, and lucky for you, they can't laugh either. (i like this one)

If you can't laugh at yourself, at least let me do it.

I don't know what makes you so dumb, but it really works.

Men are from Mars, Women are from Visa. (ok that was kind'a dumb)

I used to have super powers but my therapist took them away.




Comments on this Joke
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Posted by shimmermaid Aug 22, 2005

I like the last one best! Great job

Comment score: 2  

Posted by funnydude Aug 23, 2005

ya i like the last one too! nice joke!

Comment score: 2  

Posted by buttons Sep 12, 2005

How true!!

Comment score: 3  

Posted by michaelhomsi Sep 18, 2005

Thank God, that somebody agrees with me, let me laugh at my life !

Comment score: 4  

Posted by suthrnbabe03 Sep 20, 2005

yeah, I like the last one best too! Great Job!

Comment score: 4  

Posted by shalanda2009 Sep 21, 2005

I liked the last one too!!! Great Joke

Comment score: 3  

Posted by SexyChic Sep 22, 2005

I like all so I can't choose a favourite. They are great!!

Comment score: 3  

Posted by salem33466 Jan 29, 2006

I like the 8th one. Very very funny joke!!!!!!

Comment score: 0  

Posted by sillygoose22 Feb 06, 2006

you forgot: I know how you feel, I just dont care. those were all great and I will definitely use them!

Comment score: 0  

Posted by timmycool May 24, 2006

hahahaha!!! great! the last one is the best

Comment score: 2  

Posted by Shastaki Jun 14, 2006

The second one was the best! I cracked up!

Comment score: 1  

Posted by x0Lindsey Aug 23, 2006

I love the stranger one! Ha ha!

Comment score: 0  

Posted by ntsoaky Sep 21, 2006

I like the mirror one!

Comment score: 0  

Posted by mathlover639 Sep 21, 2006

if you thought that one joke was kinda dumb. then why'd u put it in? anyway, all the reast are great! love the last one

Comment score: 0  

Posted by joy2chipmunk Sep 21, 2006

the last one is the best by far!! most are funny though

Comment score: 2  

Posted by haha92 Oct 09, 2006

i like the 8th and last one the best!

Comment score: 1  

Posted by Alexeagle Feb 18, 2008

i like 4

Comment score: 2  

Posted by Fathead Sep 27, 2008

I'm curious. Why did the user submit one that she didn't like?

Comment score: 1  

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