Things You Would Like To Say!


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Joke ID#4984
Funny (2.84)
Rating (1.54)
CategoryAt Work  
Submitted ByJonesy
Corrected By celanba
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THINGS YOU'D LOVE TO SAY OUT LOUD AT WORK


1. I can see your point, but I still think you are full of shit.

2. I don't know what your problem is, but I'll bet it's hard to pronounce.

3. How about never? Is NEVER good for you?

4. I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.

5. I'm really easy to get along with once you people learn to see it my way.

6. I'll try being nicer if you'll try being smarter.

7. I'm out of my mind, but feel free to leave a message.

8. I don't work here, I'm a consultant.

9. It sounds like English, but I can't understand a word you're saying.

10. Ahhh....I see the screw-you fairy has visited us again.

11. I have plenty of talent and vision; I just don't give a damn.

12. I'm already visualizing the duct-tape over your mouth.

13. Thank you. We're challenged by your unique point of view.

14. Any connection between your reality and mine is purely coincidental.

15. What am I? Flypaper for freaks?

16. I'm not being rude. You're just insignificant.

17. And your cry-baby whiny-assed opinion would be...?

18. Do I look like a people person?

19. This isn't an office, it's HELL with fluorescent lighting.

20. Sarcasm is just one more service we offer.

21. If I throw a stick, will you leave?

22. Errors have been made. Others will be blamed.

23. I'm trying to imagine you with a personality.

24. A cubicle is just a padded cell without a door.

25. Can I trade this job for what's behind door #1?

26. Too many freaks, not enough circuses.

27. Chaos, panic and disorder...my work here is done.

28. Who lit the fuse on your tampon?

29. Oh I get it...like humour...but different.




Comments on this Joke
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Posted by Lidstone Jan 22, 2005

Excellent

Comment score: -1  

Posted by bird_luver Feb 05, 2005

i should try number 16... and for, number 19 never spoke a truer word! fantastic!

Comment score: 1  

Posted by purplepineapple Feb 10, 2005

My mom beleived every word!

Comment score: 1  

Posted by lostatsea Apr 26, 2005

Loved the, used some of them myself. But then again that was military

Comment score: 0  

Posted by devilslilangel Jun 08, 2005

i used one on my teacher the other day! you can imagine how that went!

Comment score: 3  

Posted by deepsea Aug 12, 2005

i like #3 the best

Comment score: 1  

Posted by ntsoaky Sep 21, 2006

I love no. 3 and 21. They r good on stupid pick up lines.

Comment score: 2  

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