Governmentium


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Joke ID#11554
Funny (2.81)
Rating (0.61)
CategoryNews / Politics  
Submitted ByBattery
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The recent hurricane and gasoline issues helped prove existence of a new element. In early October [2005] a major research institution announced discovery of the heaviest element yet known to science. The new element has been named "Government."

Governmentium (Gv) has one neutron, 25 assistant neutrons, 88 deputy neutrons, and 198 assistant deputy neutrons, giving it an atomic mass of 312.

These 312 particles are held together by forces called morons, which are surrounded by vast quantities of lepton like particles called peons. Since Gv has no electrons, it is inert. However, it can be detected, because it impedes every reaction with which it comes into contact. A minute amount of Gv causes one reaction to take over four days to complete, when it would normally take less than a second!

Gv has a normal half-life of 4 years; it does not decay, but instead undergoes a reorganization in which a portion of the assistant neutrons and deputy neutrons exchange places. In fact, Governmentium's mass will actually increase over time, since each reorganization will cause more morons to become neutrons, forming isodopes.

This characteristic of moron promotion leads some scientists to believe that Gv is formed whenever morons reach a certain quantity in concentration. This hypothetical quantity is referred to as Critical Morass.

When catalyzed with money, Gv becomes Administratium (Am) - an element which radiates just as much energy as Gv since it has half as many peons but twice as many morons.




Comments on this Joke
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Posted by timmycool May 25, 2006

a bit too complicated too be a joke

Comment score: 3  

Posted by honey_11 May 25, 2006

i just looked through it and realized that..but hey its still good

Comment score: 2  

Posted by MissSmartySkort Jun 20, 2006

somewhat confusing but still funny :-)

Comment score: 2  

Posted by Math_freak Jul 05, 2006

Complicated to understand but it sure is true!

Comment score: 1  

Posted by taran083 Jul 23, 2006

i got it. unfortunately you dont have to read the whole joke to get the delivery. Some jokes are like that and are better left as is because of it. It wouldnt be the same without all the technical data. i pity the person tho, who tries to read it and comprehend it as it is...

Comment score: 2  

Posted by hubluza Jul 28, 2006

it seems like a pun

Comment score: 1  

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