Chuck Norris Facts: 27


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Joke ID#10511
Funny (1.62)
Rating (1.49)
CategoryOther / Misc  
Submitted ByGeemiee
Corrected By boodler
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For Spring Break '05, Chuck Norris drove to Madagascar, riding a chariot pulled by two electric eels.

The Manhattan Project was not intended to create nuclear weapons, it was meant to recreate the destructive power in a Chuck Norris roundhouse kick. They didn't even come close.

Chuck Norris has banned rainbows from the state of North Dakota.

Divide Chuck Norris by zero and you will in fact get one; one bad-ass, that is.

TNT was originally developed by Chuck Norris to cure indigestion.

After returning from World War 2 unscathed, Bob Dole was congratulated by Chuck Norris with a handshake. The rest is history.

Chuck Norris runs on batteries. Specifically, Die Hards.

"Let the Bodies Hit the Floor" was originally written as Chuck Norris' theme song.

Chuck Norris will never have a heart attack. His heart isn't nearly foolish enough to attack him.

Only Chuck Norris can prevent forest fires.

When Chuck Norris makes a burrito, its main ingredient is real toes.

Chuck Norris is not Irish. His hair is soaked in the blood of his victims.

In the movie "The Matrix", Chuck Norris is the Matrix. If you pay close attention in the green "falling code" scenes, you can make out the faint texture of his beard.

Chuck Norris' dick is so big, it has its own dick, and that dick is still bigger than yours.

They say curiosity killed the cat. This is false. Chuck Norris killed the cat. Every single one of them.




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Posted by celanba Feb 27, 2006

Not the kitties!!!!!!

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