Chuck Norris Facts: 21


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Joke ID#10505
Funny (1.86)
Rating (1.33)
CategoryOther / Misc  
Submitted ByGeemiee
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The First Law of Thermodynamics states that energy can neither be created nor destroyed... unless it meets Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris doesn't go on the internet, he has every internet site stored in his memory. He refreshes webpages by blinking.

Fact: Chuck Norris doesn't consider it sex if the woman survives.

It is said that looking into Chuck Norris' eyes will reveal your future. Unfortunately, everybody's future is always the same: death by a roundhouse-kick to the face.

Chuck Norris knows everything there is to know - Except for the definition of mercy.

Scientifically speaking, it is impossible to charge Chuck Norris with "obstruction of justice." This is because even Chuck Norris cannot be in two places at the same time.

Chuck Norris never has to wax his skis because they're always slick with blood.

When you say "no one's perfect", Chuck Norris takes this as a personal insult.

Chuck Norris can win a game of Trivial Pursuit with one roll of the dice, and without answering a single question... just a nod of the head, and a stroke of the beard.

182,000 Americans die from Chuck Norris-related accidents every year.

Paper beats rock, rock beats scissors, and scissors beats paper, but Chuck Norris beats all 3 at the same time.

Jesus can walk on water, but Chuck Norris can walk on Jesus.

All roads lead to Chuck Norris. And by the transitive property, a roundhouse kick to the face.

If you're driving down the road and you think Chuck Norris just cut you off, you better thank your lucky stars it wasn't the other way around.

July 4th is Independence day. And the day Chuck Norris was born. Coincidence? i think not.




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Posted by girliepie Jul 04, 2006

Who is Chuck Norris anyway? These jokes are annoying, I don't even bother to read them anymore.

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