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Joke ID#3807
Funny (3.18)
Rating (1.14)
CategoryMen / Women  
Submitted Byliltunalol
Corrected By imlaughin
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I was riding to work yesterday when I observed a female driver cut right in front of a pickup truck causing him to have to drive on to the shoulder to avoid hitting her. This evidently angered the driver enough that he hung his arm out his window and flipped the woman off.

"Man, that guy is stupid!" I thought to myself.

I ALWAYS smile nicely and wave in a sheepish manner whenever a female does anything to me in traffic and here's why:

I drive 48 miles each way every day to work, that's 96 miles each day.
Of these, 16 miles each way is bumper-to-bumper.
Most of the bumper-to-bumper is on an 8 lane highway so if you just look at the 7 lanes I am not in, that means I pass something like a new car every 40 feet per lane.
That's 7 cars every 40 feet for 32 miles.
That works out to be 982 cars every mile, or 31,424 cars.
Even though the rest of the 32 miles is not bumper to bumper, I figure I pass at least another 4000 cars.
That brings the number to something like 36,000 cars I pass every day.
Statistically, half of these are driven by females, that's 18,000.
In any given group of females 1 in 28 are having the worst day of their period.
That's 642.
According to Cosmopolitan, 70% describe their love life as dissatisfying or unrewarding.
That's 449.
According to the National Institute of Health, 22% of all females have seriously considered suicide or homicide.
That's 98.
And 34% describe men as their biggest problem.
That's 33.
According to the National Rifle Association 5% of all females carry weapons and this number is increasing.
That means that EVERY SINGLE DAY, I drive past at least one female that has a lousy love life, thinks men are her biggest problem, has seriously considered suicide or homicide, is having the worst day of her period, and is armed.

Flip one off?

.....I think not.




Comments on this Joke
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Posted by juggleboy502 Aug 10, 2005

haha that was good

Comment score: 2  

Posted by tennesseehick Oct 25, 2005

that joke is f-in hilarious!!

Comment score: -1  

Posted by tennesseehick Dec 17, 2005

haha i love it every time!!!

Comment score: 0  

Posted by idiot_genius May 08, 2006

As a girl i must say: LMAO!!!!!!!!!!!!

Comment score: 1  

Posted by MissSmartySkort Jun 17, 2006

ROFLMAO!!!!

Comment score: -1  

Posted by goosh Jul 13, 2006

wow that is amazing, if only every guy thought like that!

Comment score: 3  

Posted by mydarklife Aug 11, 2006

flip any girl off and your in some deep $#!^

Comment score: 0  

Posted by flamehead Oct 25, 2006

HAHAHA really funny and so true, all guys must read this!

Comment score: -1  

Posted by smile-14 Jan 04, 2008

now this is a classic !! as a girl i must say that guy is smart!! )

Comment score: 1  

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