Windows95 Compared to Jesus

Joke ID#16132
Funny (2.26)
Rating (1.09)
Submitted Byshenqiang
Corrected By snakeyboy
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If you have half a brain, you can't help but notice the throng of publications, analysts and net users declaring Windows95 the Saviour of the Computer Industry. If you have less than half a brain, you probably believe it. Could it be?

To find out, let's compare Windows95 against a widely-accepted Saviour, Jesus of Nazareth:

Jesus Windows95

Jesus: Said, "Surely I come quickly."
Windows 95: Has been promised "any day now."

Jesus:Is taking a lot longer to actually arrive
Windows 95: Is taking a lot longer to actually

Jesus: Can walk on water.
Windows 95: Can crawl on a 486.

Jesus: Sits in judgement at the pearly
Windows 95: Will be used to judge Bill Gates.

Jesus: Bible says, "In Him, all things Windows 95 doesn't even run all
are possible."
Windows 95: doesn't even run all
possible Windows apps.

Jesus: Started life as a carpenter.
Windows 95:Turns perfectly good computers into

Jesus: Born in a manger.
Windows 95:Resembles something found in a barn.

Jesus:Remembered for protecting the
Windows 95:Has weak memory protection.

Jesus:Was raised from the dead.
Windows 95:Was created from Windows 3.1.

Jesus performed great works for
the multitudes.
Windows 95 multitasking performance
barely works.

Jesus has no sin.
Windows 95 has no shame.

if this offends any Christians out there, I don't really care. But you can email me if you think it will make you feel better.

Comments on this Joke
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Posted by enderofgames Apr 25, 2009

The grammar is so horrible that it ruins the joke. It would be nice to be able to read the joke once through and understand, not spend 3 minutes per line.

Comment score: 1  

Posted by snakeyboy Oct 02, 2009

He tried to do one down one side and the other down the other. and messed up the formatting.

Comment score: 0  

Posted by snakeyboy Oct 02, 2009

I fixed it. verify corrections.

Comment score: 0  

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