51 Ways To Annoy Everyone


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Joke ID#1251
Funny (2.51)
Rating (0.74)
CategoryOther / Misc  
Submitted ByDrunky
Corrected By celanba
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1) Pretend to be one of the Bush family. Doesn't matter which.

2) Have an uncontrollable lusting for someone new every five minutes.

3) Pretend to be from different ethnic backgrounds every hour, and when people ask you about it, answer like a hillbilly would.

4) Act like a hillbilly. Period.

5) Improvise Italian operas.

6) Gossip about someone to their face.

7) Answer every question with a question.

8) Repeat yourself constantly.

9) Act like a member of the opposite sex.

10) Repeat yourself constantly.

11) Act like Mr. Flanders from The Simpsons.

12) Repeat yourself constantly.

13) Change what you repeat every now and then.

14) Use homonyms in your e-male that the spell cheque would knot sea as miss steaks.

15) Change what you repeat every now and then.

16) Talk to someone while looking at somebody else.

17) Employ in your casual banter extensive vocabulary that will befuddle thy contemporaries.

18) Change what you repeat every now and then.

19) One word: Caffeine.

20) Another word or two: Caffeine and Sugar.

21) stringwhateveryousayintoonelongwordsoitshardtomakeoutwhatyou'resaying.

22) Using non-existent words like George Bush would.

23) Change what you repeat again.

24) Speak in rapid Spanish.

25) Pretend not to know about the rule of personal space.

26) When doing number 25, pretend to have a heavy nose cold causing you to breathe heavily through your mouth. Sneeze occasionally.

27) Change what you repeat again.

28) You are better than everybody else. Let them know so.

29) Rudely correct everybody's grammar.

30) Don't proper grammar use while you are correcting them.

31) Pretend to be drunk.

32) Groom yourself while standing backwards (towards everybody) in an elevator.

33) Change what you repeat again.

34) Pretend your name is Cletus-Atkins-Wheatherby-Percival-Smith, and don't answer to anything else.

35) Call everybody you know Bob or Georgia. Bob for girls, Georgia for boys.

36) Fine people for stupid things, like being too popular, or having to many teeth.

37) Change what you repeat again.

38) For those who wish to annoy, riddles is that in which you should speak.

39) Lick your lips constantly, acting as if doing so is pleasurable.

40) Pretend to be high.

41) Become severely narcoleptic in the middle of a conversazzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.

42) Change what you repeat again.

43) You ARE the lord of the dance. Never forget that.

44) Speak in Gaelic.

45) Blink rapidly and constantly.

46) Scratch yourself constantly. I am not saying where.

47) Strut.

48) Start repeating what you say as soon as you say it.

49) Start repeating what you say as soon as you say it.

50) Become "The Masked Wedgie Giver."

51) Have this list printed on a T-shirt and write above it "Check list for Today." Don't let anybody forget that you have it on.




Comments on this Joke
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Posted by Gizzer Jun 05, 2003

52) Take a bad joke too far

Comment score: 2  

Posted by datra16 Jun 05, 2003

i thought some of them were very funny! haha

Comment score: 1  

Posted by GamerDudeManJr Jun 13, 2003

Great work, person!

Comment score: 2  

Posted by Jesse_12 Jun 16, 2003

There'rs actually only 50 'cause you skipped #45

Comment score: -1  

Posted by Drunky Jun 17, 2003

45) Blink rapidly and constantly.

Comment score: 1  

Posted by Jesse_12 Jul 05, 2003

Just 4 get my comment.

Comment score: 2  

Posted by sarcastic_brat53 Aug 30, 2003

hehehe really good joke!!! I gotta try some of those! they sound like fun!

Comment score: 0  

Posted by imlaughin Sep 14, 2005

i love the bush referances!

Comment score: 1  

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